Letter to Paul Lafargue, August 13, 1866

Author(s)	Karl Marx
Written	13 August 1866

First published in: Marx and Engels, Works, Second Russian Edition, Vol. 31, Moscow, 1963. Translated from the French
Published in English in full for the first time in Marx-Engels Collected Works, Volume 42

MARX TO PAUL LAFARGUE^[1]

IN LONDON

London, 13 August 1866

My dear Lafargue,

Allow me to make the following observations:

1. If you wish to continue your relations with my daughter,^[2] you will have to give up your present manner of 'courting'. You know full well that no engagement has been entered into, that as yet everything is undecided. And even if she were formally betrothed to you, you should not forget that this is a matter of long duration. The practice of excessive intimacy is especially inapprop- riate since the two lovers will be living at the same place for a necessarily prolonged period of severe testing and purgatory. I have observed with alarm how your conduct has altered from one day to the next within the geological period of one single week. To my mind, true love expresses itself in reticence, modesty and even the shyness of the lover towards the object of his veneration, and certainly not in giving free rein to one's passion and in premature demonstrations of familiarity. If you should urge your Creole temperament in your defence, it is my duty to interpose my sound reason between your temperament and my daughter. If in her presence you are incapable of loving in a manner in keeping with the London latitude, you will have to resign yourself to loving her from a distance. I am sure you will take the hint.

2. Before your relationship with Laura is finally settled, I must have proper clarification of your financial position. My daughter believes that I am conversant with your affairs. She is mistaken. I did not raise this question because I believed it was incumbent upon you to take the initiative. You know that I have sacrificed my whole fortune to the revolutionary struggle. I do not regret it. Quite the contrary. If I had to begin my life over again, I would do the same. I would not marry, however. As far as it lies within my power, I wish to save my daughter from the reefs on which her mother's life was wrecked. Had it not been for my direct intervention (a weakness on my part) and the influence that my friendship for you exerted on my daughter's conduct, this affair would never have progressed to its present point; for this reason I bear a heavy personal responsibility. As far as your immediate situation is concerned, the information which has come my way, although I did not seek it, is by no means reassuring. But let's not deal with that now. Regarding your position in general, I know that you are still a student, that your career in France has been half ruined by the events at Liège,^[3] that you still lack an indispensable tool for your acclimatisation in England, the language, and that your prospects are at best entirely problematic. Observation has persuaded me that you are not very industrious by nature, despite spasmodic feverish activity and good intentions. In these circumstances, you will need external support if you are to set out in life with my daughter. I know nothing of your family. Although they may enjoy a comfortable living, that does not in itself mean that they would be disposed to make sacrifices for you. I do not even know with what favour they regard your proposed alliance. I repeat that I must have positive clarification on all these matters. Moreover, as an avowed realist, you cannot, of course, expect that I should behave as an idealist in respect of my daughter's future. Such a positive person as yourself, who would abolish poetry, will not wish to make poetry to the detriment of my child.

3. To preclude any misinterpretation of this letter, I would like to state that—were you in a position to enter into matrimony today—it would not come about. My daughter would refuse. I myself should object. You must have achieved something in life before thinking of marriage, and a long period of testing is required of you and of Laura.

4. I would like this letter to remain confidential between ourselves. I await your reply.

Yours very truly

Karl Marx

↑ Part of this letter was published in English for the first time in K. Marx, On Education, Women and Children, McGraw-Hill Book Company, New York, 1975
↑ Laura Marx
↑ In December 1865 and January 1866 France was the scene of student disorders. They were caused by the decision of the Paris Academy Council to expel students who took part in the International Students' Congress held in Liège (Belgium) at the end of October 1865. The congress was attended by students from many European countries, the most numerous delegation being from France (Paul Lafargue, Charles Longuet, Charles Victor Jaclard, and others). Most speakers at the congress expressed the revolutionary students' protest against the regime of the Second Empire.

[1] Part of this letter was published in English for the first time in K. Marx, On Education, Women and Children, McGraw-Hill Book Company, New York, 1975

[2] Laura Marx

[3] In December 1865 and January 1866 France was the scene of student disorders. They were caused by the decision of the Paris Academy Council to expel students who took part in the International Students' Congress held in Liège (Belgium) at the end of October 1865. The congress was attended by students from many European countries, the most numerous delegation being from France (Paul Lafargue, Charles Longuet, Charles Victor Jaclard, and others). Most speakers at the congress expressed the revolutionary students' protest against the regime of the Second Empire.

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